Twinkies files for bankruptcy protection-The beginning of the Mayan 2012 Doom
According to the hype, the Mayans “predicted” the end of the world. I believe the cataclysmic event has started…………Twinkies, Ding Dongs, Ho-Ho’s and Wonderbread have hit hard times.
Their parent company, Hostess Brands Inc., just filed for bankruptcy protection as it struggles with pension and benefits costs, competition, and the tough economy.
But what on earth can compete with a Twinkie? After all, it is the only snack which gives you a legal defense! (Remember Dan White who shot and killed SF Mayor George Moscone and Supervisor Harvey Milk because of the depression he suffered after eating the spongy, yellow snack?)
Apparently in these tough times, Americans are soothing their soul with yogurts and power bars instead of Twinkies. They are substituting the Twinkie sugars (37g) for the yogurt sugars (27g). Gee, this is so much healthier.
Oddly enough, the Twinkie was born in the Great Depression of the 1930’s.
The original snack was a strawberry filled shortcake sold only during strawberry season. During the Great Depression of the 1930’s, a bakery manager created a banana-flavored cream so the sponge cakes could be produced year-round. Selling for only 5 cents, they were wildly popular.
Banana rationing in World War II forced the Twinkie filling to be replaced with the vanilla cream which we still know today.
Hostess employees are unionized while most of its competitors aren’t. This results in the high pension and medical costs. Rivals such as Bimbo Bakeries and Little Debbie snack cakes are creeping into the picture. But this I know for sure - nobody doesn’t like Sara Lee if she takes down our iconic Twinkie.
After all, the Twinkie has been placed in the Time Capsule in the White House. The Twinkie Company must not fail. It is the only food known to man which will endure the smorgasbord of Mayan astronomical events. The future of man depends on it.
